Beautyscopes

By Amber Roniger

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A Love Letter to Spring: (chanting) Ole, ole, ole-oli, it’s Spring outside! We usher in April with uproarious applause (golf-claps) and much anticipated fanfare (tu-tu-tu-tooot!). It’s about time – buggery bollox! Where have you been? I was just about to give up and head south! Thank heavens the season of my contentment has seen fit to show its supple face once again and I’m tickled with elation. Right now we’re in the most fantab position to transition from March madness into Spring fever. How I do admire you, April – easy, breezy, glamorous, passionate, air-kissing afternoons in the park, lazy and replenishing. Season of rebirth, new beginnings, hot pink mani’s, sunbaths and Havianas. Keen to don gauzy dresses, floppy hats and tulip-tinted glasses, gloss up the kissers and step out on the breezy beat, aw-yeah! Springtime, my homegirl, how often I dreamed of thee, on frigid, insipid nights, let me count the ways…static hair a’cracklin, pallor pasty at best, polish piteously chipping from whimpering petunias and dying, I swear I heard actual sucking sounds as my skin dehydrated. (Do you imagine me affected by a touch of the winter lunacy?) Screw timid sidestepping, I-say, I-say ladies, and have a fling, smoke a tree, strap on those strapping strappies, my chickidies. Pump up the glam and spiff out the shine and forge ahead most fervently into the fervor and mayhem. Shower me with your springy gifts, lavish my bodily shrine, Great-Auntie Spring, you grand dame of feminine seasons. Regal epitome, most esteemed time of year when everything comes to life – love ‘ya and word to the motha!

Your faithful admirer & ardent tree-hugger,
Amber
(P.S. Eagerly anticipating my first writer’s tan!)

Originally published April 2007

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  

  
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