I like to think of the New York department stores as my friends – Bloomingdales, Barneys, Saks, Bergdorf, and Henri – yes, there are others, but they’re more like aquaintances (oh, shut up Macy, you know what you said about me at last year’s Christmas Party). So, as I’m sure you all know, I like to brag about my friends when bragging is deserved and sometimes even when it’s not deserved, but that’s not the case right now. My dear friend Henri – Mr. Bendel to those outside the circle – has two big big things happening at his store that I’d like to share with you. Sharing is caring, and I’m damn happy to do it.

First and foremost – this is clearly the month to flip breast cancer the bird, and Bendel’s is joining in and telling breast cancer to kiss our ass. Alors, I have a question for y’all: Who does not have the Bendel’s signature brown/white striped cosmetic bag? I carry mine with me every day – and I’ll never forget the day I got it. It felt like I was coming home…ah, the memories. Anyhow, chances are you’re reading this and saying, “who doesn’t have one of those bags?” I happen to agree with you, but my hunches tell me there are a few unassuming ladies out there who haven’t gotten the message yet. So, I’m leaving the message after the beep: GET ONE OF THESE BECAUSE YOU’RE THE ONLY ONE WHO DOESN’T HAVE ONE. Oh, you like to be original and not have something that everybody else and their mother has? Ok, ok…I dig the originality, unique thing. So, why don’t you get the [i]Limited Edition Signature[/i] Cosmetic Bag, which not only carries your favorite gloss, but also benefits the fight against cancer by supporting the Young Survival Coalition (YSC). Unlike the classique Bendel bag, this one adorned the famous brown and white stripes, but has hot pink piping and a hot pink zipper. C’est tres fabuleux, non?

The YSC is the only non-profit that is focused on the needs, support, and concerns of breast cancer’s youngest survivors. The Limited Edition bag will retail for $40, and $25 of that will go to the YSC in observance of Breast Cancer Awareness Month. For all of you mathematically challenged shoppers, that is more than 50% of the proceeds going to help young survivors, fighters, and supporters. You get a limited edition item from Bendels that is adorable and utilitarian. Uh, hello, it’s fantastique. Actually, I’m sitting here writing this wondering if I have time to go tomorrow to buy one for myself and every strong, amazing female I know. If I have anything to do with it, we all need to kick this big bitch in the ass and get breast cancer out of every single place it is for good.

In case you don’t know where Bendel’s is (and in that case, I’m sorry, you’re clearly deprived), it’s on 5th Avenue at 56th street, and you can always call 800-HBENDEL with questions. I mean, not always always – I’m sure they’re closed at some point…

Second and not second-most because it’s just as awesome as foremost – since you’re going to be going to Bendel’s anyhow to buy you’re limited edition cosmetic bag, you are probably going to want to know that now, right now, is the Bendel’s Fall Denim Event. But, but, what does this mean???? I know, it’s all so much information, let’s process it together, shall we?

The denim event has actually been going on since the middle of last week, but…hey, give me a break, I’m only human, so I’m writing about it now. Meet representatives from your favorite denim companies, get tips on all the hottest styles of the season, maybe some refreshments, oh, yeah, and free gifts (depends on the day, the company, and whether or not you buy a pair of jeans – not going to lie, but let’s face it, you’ll probably buy a pair of jeans).

So, since I missed like five days of this event, you’re probably thinking there isn’t going to be anything left – ha ha ha, you asshole, you’re SO WRONG.

Monday, October 10: Denim For Immortality is in da house where you can meet one of their stylists in person and get a professionals opinion of what your ass looks like in the jeans.

Tuesday, October 11: Meet a stylist from Union Jeans, and beg them to switch jobs with you.

Wednesday, October 12: Salt Jeans stylists’ are moving into Bendel’s for the day, and are going to add some spice to your denim wardrobe (ok, bad pun, let’s move on).

Friday & Saturday, October 14 – October 15: Ta-Da! Rendez-vous with the stylists from Joe’s Jeans, and receive a tote bag with your purchase. On Friday from 5-7 pm there will be music and drinks. Uh, hi … that is so fab, and it ends early enough to hit up happy hour.

Sunday, October 16: Rock & Republic. You & Jeans. Beautiful couples make me tear up just a little bit. Receive a t-shirt with your purchase, which is perfect, because you’re walking away with a complete outfit almost. Yay for nearly complete outfits.

I hate to bring this up, but clearly those free gifts are while supplies last – just so I don’t get any angry emails about how there were no more tote bags. I know I’d be pissed if there were no more tote bags – I get it, I feel your pain.

You can also enter for a chance to win a week of denim, which includes a personalized consultation with some serious denim gurus and your choice of the perfect makes-your-ass-look-like-a-million-bucks-pair-of-jeans for every day of the week. That is, like, soooo much better than winning $5 on a scratch card.

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